🌀 Introduction: The Pinterest-Proverbs Problem

Let’s be honest.

Somewhere between King Sh’lomo’s (Solomon’s) pen and your favorite Instagram quote, the Proverbs 31 woman got, well… domesticated.

What started as a poem of praise for a “woman of virtue” somehow morphed into a checklist for Christian perfection:

• Wake up at dawn ✅
• Make bread from scratch ✅
• Smile without ceasing ✅
• Never raise your voice or your eyebrows ✅✅

And don’t forget: do it all while looking effortlessly radiant in silk and purple. Because obviously.

But here’s the thing:
That’s not what the text says.
Not even close. (shocker I know)

I’m deeply drawn to the real Proverbs 31 woman.

Reading her in context didn’t burden me with more to prove—it actually gave me permission to breathe.

To build. To lead. To be strong, loud, entrepreneurial.
And still be exactly the kind of woman Scripture calls “eshet chayil.”

There’s a biblical blueprint here for women who never felt at home in the “quiet baker of bread who never leaves the house” mold. (If that’s you, cool my dude—bake on. No shade.)

But for the rest of us?
There’s room at the table too. And apparently, we’re the ones bringing scarlet and swords.

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🪖 Woman of Virtue? The Warrior Behind the Words

“Who can find a virtuous woman (eshet chayil)? For her price is far above rubies.” – Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:10 Cepher

Let’s get this straight:
Eshet chayil (אֵשֶׁת־חַיִל) does not mean “virtuous woman.”

That English translation?
It’s doing some serious sanitizing.

• Eshet means “woman” or “wife.”
• Chayil is the Hebrew word for strength, valor, might, wealth, efficiency, and even military power.

It’s the same word used throughout the Bible to describe:

• Men of war (Shemot [Exodus] 18:21 — “men of chayil”)
• David’s mighty warriors (Shemu’el Ri’shon [1 Samuel] 14:52)
• Capable leaders and commanders (Divrei Hayamiym [1 Chronicles] 7:11)
• Armies and nations (Yeshayahu [Isaiah] 36:5)

So when Proverbs 31 begins with “Who can find an eshet chayil?”
…it’s not asking, “Who can find a woman who always remembers to iron?”

It’s asking, “Where is the woman who fights for what’s right, builds with her hands, leads with wisdom, and lives with fearless trust in Elohiym (God)?”

Even Ruth—yes, that Ruth, the Moabitess widow navigating famine and foreign land—is called an eshet chayil in Ruth 3:11

And it wasn’t because she embroidered throw pillows.

It was because she was loyal, bold, and courageous in her pursuit of Yahuah’s redemption story.

So how did we get from valor to virtue?

The Hebrew calls her a woman of chayil—strength, power, valor. Early translators actually meant something close to that, since ‘virtue’ once carried the sense of courage and excellence. But over time, as the English meaning of ‘virtue’ narrowed to modesty and sexual purity, the biblical picture of the Proverbs 31 woman was softened into something far less than the warrior the text celebrates.

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💼 Businesswoman, Boss, and Beloved

It’s one thing to call the Proverbs 31 woman “strong.”
It’s another to actually look at what she does.

Because this eshet chayil isn’t strong in theory—she’s strong in the field. And in her body. And the market. And the home. And the boardroom, if she had one.

Let’s unpack it.

📌 She scouts opportunities and invests wisely

“She considers a field, and buys it: with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.” –Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:16, Cepher

She’s not impulsive. She’s strategic.
She doesn’t just wander past a nice plot of land—she considers it. Weighs the ROI. Makes a move. Then gets her hands dirty and plants legacy into the soil.

She’s building generational wealth.

📌 She manufactures and sells products

“She makes fine linen, and sells it; and delivers girdles unto the merchant.”
–Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:24, Cepher

She’s not just crafting for the aesthetics.
She’s running a product line. Linen and belts were high-value commodities—and she’s got supply chains and merchant relationships to prove it.

This woman doesn’t just make Pinterest boards.
She makes profit.

📌 She manages a household team

“She rises also while it is yet night, and gives meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.” –Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:15, Cepher

Let’s talk about that last part: her maidens.
Yes, she had help. And she managed that help. This wasn’t a solo hustle; it was a well-oiled operation with people relying on her leadership and provision.

She’s not running herself ragged.
She’s running an organization.

📌 She speaks with wisdom and leads with kindness

“She opens her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the Torah (law) of kindness.” –Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:26, Cepher

She’s not loud just to be loud.
She’s respected because her words carry weight. Wisdom and kindness aren’t opposites—they’re partners. And she leads with both.

📌 She prepares for every season

“She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.” –Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:21, Cepher

This isn’t about winter fashion (ok maybe a little 💅🏻)—it’s foresight.
She doesn’t panic when times get hard. She’s already done the work. Her people are covered in quality, luxury, and forethought.

Her planning doesn’t just meet the moment.
It outpaces it.

📌 She’s strong—and she’s not hiding it

“She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.” –Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:17, Cepher (see my post about women and weight lifting here)

“Strength and honor are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.” –Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:25, Cepher

She wears strength like a well-tailored outfit.
She’s not intimidated by the future—she laughs at it. Not because life is easy, but because she knows who she is. And more importantly, who she belongs to.

This woman’s got range.
She’s managing people. Making deals. Running operations. Dressing her family in scarlet.

She doesn’t wait to be told what to do.
She sees a field and buys it. She sees the needs of her household and meets them. She sees opportunities and acts.

And get this: her husband?
He’s not micromanaging her.

He’s at the city gates—publicly praising her strength.
He knows what he has. And he honors it.

This isn’t a woman trying to stay “in her place.”
This is a woman walking in her purpose.

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🪞 What Her Strength Reveals About Yahuah (The Lord)

Here’s where things get even more beautiful.

The very last verse of Proverbs 31 gives away the secret to this woman’s strength:

“Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that fears Yahuah, she shall be praised.”
–Mishlei (Proverbs) 31:30, Cepher

All her valor, grit, wisdom, and enterprise? It’s not fueled by ego or hustle.
It’s rooted in awe.

She fears Yahuah (The Lord). Not in a trembling, I’m-not-worthy way— But in the reverent, worshipful, my-life-is-His kind of way.

Somehow, the woman Scripture calls eshet chayil—a warrior of wisdom, strength, and strategy—got rebranded into a soft-spoken stay-at-home-in-your-designated-lane domestic icon.

But that’s not the picture Scripture paints. And frankly, that version never resonated with me.

She doesn’t wait for permission.
She doesn’t apologize for her gifts.
She doesn’t shrink to fit a cultural mold.

That’s not rebellious.
It’s righteous.

Because when we view her through the lens of chayil—valor, strength, power—we stop seeing femininity as fragile. And we start seeing it as formidable.

Not in spite of Scripture,
but because of it.

This isn’t a mold we squeeze into—
It’s a model of what happens when a woman fears Yahuah and lives boldly in her call.

So if you’ve never been the quiet, stay-in-the-kitchen type?
Cool, my dude. Neither was she.

She’s a battle-tested, Spirit-filled force of good.
A builder. A strategist. A woman who fears Yahuah (the Lord)—and walks like it. A woman of valor.

If like me, you’ve ever been told to tone it down, or take up less space—You’re not doing it wrong. You just might be walking in the same spirit that Scripture calls eshet chayil.

She knows where her strength comes from.
She’s not trying to dominate, prove herself, or gain approval through productivity. She’s living in alignment with the One who created her.

And when a woman is deeply rooted in Yahuah’s strength?
The world feels it. She is a force to be reckoned with.

Because she becomes a reflection—not of culture’s expectations—
but of Elohiym’s image.

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🧩 This Isn’t a One-Off: Scripture Has Always Told This Story

Proverbs 31 isn’t an isolated ode to one remarkable woman.
It’s part of a much bigger, deeply consistent picture.

From the very beginning, Yahuah (the Lord) called the woman ezer kenegdo—a powerful aid, a co-laborer, a military-grade ally. Ezer is the same word He uses to describe Himself when He comes to Israel’s defense. (See blog post Biblical Women Pt. 2 Creation and the Ezer Kenegdo)

And now in Proverbs, scripture calls her eshet chayil—a woman of valor.
The same word used to describe warriors, armies, and kings.

These aren’t soft compliments.
They’re battle-ready affirmations of identity.

Taken together, they reveal something stunning:

Yahuah never viewed women as ornamental.
He viewed them as essential.

From Eden to Proverbs, the story hasn’t changed.

It’s time we stop minimizing what Yahuah empowered—
and start honoring the design He never revoked.

And next?

We’re pulling back the curtain on how the church lost sight of this strength—
and how Messiah’s example still calls it back.